At the age of seven, I once thought that scientists would be able to know all information in the universe by simply performing enough research. I now know that this is not true. At age fourteen, I embarked on a spiritual quest in an attempt to understand that part of myself that I thought must live on after death. I now no longer think that any such part of me exists, other than in the memory of my friends. When I was eighteen, I thought that my phallus was crafted by Eros to bring orgasms to the women of the world. To this day, that belief remains unshaken.